Crossing The Bridge Alone as a Latina: Finding Success is Knowing Your Tribe
Women embrace belonging as they navigate unique life experiences, sharing a common strength in their tribe and their cultural authenticity.
By Rubi Capellan
As an immigrant, one of the many superpowers that adjusting to a new home and a new language brings is the self-starting skills of blooming in any environment.
Being in a foreign space can be overwhelming for anyone. The unknown often feels confusing, and more times than not, boldly taking on a new challenge can turn into a maze of self-doubt, discomfort and belonging. The Latino community can relate to that feeling when there is a road to be traveled alone.
“Both of my parents didn’t graduate high school,” Jasmin Acevedo, a therapist, doctor and professor at New York University, says “My dad got his GED. So, having an academic career was overwhelming and confusing. Because I didn’t know anyone who had gone to college, I thought, ‘Okay, I’m just doing this journey on my own.’ As best as my parents helped me in the process by providing basic needs so that I could focus on college, It was still scary to go to college.”
Acevedo wrote a chapter titled “Re-Establishing the Roots of Community” in a book called Latinx in Social Work Vol. 1, in which she shares her story more in depth. She talks about how impostor syndrome plagued her academic career.
“[It] was something that I think plagued me, just my entire academic career, especially because all of my schooling has been in what’s called PWI (Predominantly white institutions),” she says. When Acevedo was in doctoral class at New York University, she was in a cohort of 14 students in which she was the only Latina. “You wonder whether you know enough or should even have a seat at the table,” she explains.
Acevedo’s experience correlates with Anny Batista, creator and co-founder of Lauxury Lounge. They both struggle under the pressure of becoming the only ones representing success. “I have my sister, but she’s my step-sister, so being an only child [from my mom], especially after she moved out, was like, ‘Whoa! All eyes on me! All bets are on me!’” expresses Batista, remembering the pressure she felt being the one to represent success in her family. “It’s a lot of pressure, definitely a lot of pressure.”
For Batista and Acevedo, balancing and managing success while providing for themselves is a challenge they now see as valuable. It shapes who they are and where they come from.
Acevedo says, “I’m starting to understand that I have my own lived experience, knowledge and education that God has allowed me to provide and experience. And that is something I utilize: my faith, my education, my knowledge.”
Batista finds motivation in her mom’s life. She describes her mom as her role model, the rock and number one cheerleader for her life’s challenges. Batista says, “Raising me as a single mother [was] hard, so seeing that motivated me to say, ‘I want something good to come out [of my life].’”
Nail technician and creator of Silvia Designs Silvia Medina shares a different perspective in finding her success, but her experiences are very similar. “I’ve always been alone. On my own merits with my personal community: my husband Giovanny, my sister Angelica and my children,” she recalls as she mentions her support group.
Silvia arrived in the United States at 19 years old. She worked for about 12 years in the nail tech industry before she felt fully confident to open up her own business. Having undergone a previous business failure, Medina also felt the pressure of enduring, providing for herself and believing that she belonged doing what she loves.
“My daughter Dana, who has been my number one fan every step I take, she is there applauding me, saying, ‘Mommy, you can do it. Mommy, yes you can do it. You can do it!’ Those are her words, even though she is nine years old, she is wise for her age, she understands mommy’s journey,” she says of her daughter Dana, who is her biggest inspiration. “Sorry, I’m going to cry because all this time that she has been in school, I think there have been only a few times — maybe five or six times at the most — that I have been able to pick her up during the year. And today I have the opportunity to go pick her up [every day] and get that big hug from her and [hear her] say, ‘Mommy, I was waiting for this to happen!’”
These self-starter women know their tribe because, like Acevedo mentioned, “Know who your tribe is, whether that is your physical community, neighborhood, your faith community, your immediate support, like immediate family members, because in the middle of uncertainty, or as you navigate new challenges on a journey, you want to stay grounded in that. To remind you of who you are, to remind you of how far you’ve come and to remind you of all that you have survived and all that you are capable of doing.”
Then, she adds, you can look back and say, “Wow, I’m grounded in all these things. These things shaped who I am. I have enough capability and knowledge to continue in this journey.”
